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The First Man A Daughter Loves

A dad is the first man a daughter loves.  Her experiences with her dad will predict her relationships’ success in her adult years. A dad’s positive involvement in his daughter’s life correlated with a list of positive benefits such as “better peer relationships; fewer behavior problems;  higher educational status; capacity for empathy; non-traditional attitudes to earning and childcare; more satisfying adult sexual partnerships; and higher self-esteem, life-satisfaction and ‘locus of control”


One way to ensure that our daughters love and develop a healthy self-esteem is by showing them respect while they are young. If you expect them not interrupt you while you are talking, then set the example and don’t interrupt them while they are speaking. If you want them to trust self, and believe in themselves, sincerely tell them how wonderful they are and how glad you are that they are in your life.

Another way to show that you value your daughter is by spending time doing what she wants to do. Give her your undivided attention. Just think of all the errands that kids go on with you. Do you think they enjoy waiting in line at the grocery store or sitting in a chair twice too big for them while you get your haircut? Probably not, but any situation can lend itself to quality time if you make it educational and fun. You just might get better cooperation as a daughter loves the connection to each parent. In a daughter’s early years, the impression of how she if fathered will be the map for how she explores relationships as she matures.

At age seven, Karrie is just as at home in her backyard climbing a tree as she is playing in her Barbie doll castle. As a daughter loves her father, she has pretended to be a princess who dances and sings with to her dad, Prince Charming. But, her father, John, has a tendency to tease her about being a princess as she primps in front of the mirror or puts on a beauty pageant for anyone who will sit still long enough for her to change into her next costume.

Inwardly, John is thinking his daughter will grow up to be spoiled and think everyone should cater to her. What he may not realize is that his daughter’s self-esteem is fragile and that she truly needs his approval. In pre-adolescent years, a daughter loves by forming their opinion of how men are supposed to treat women. The examples dads set and the attention they pay their daughters at this age will go with these little ladies the rest of their lives.

I am thrilled to see that Dad’s involvement has emerged in the current generation. Fathering has taken a huge step forward and the absent fathers typical of my childhood have been replaced by dads who are home a lot more and are spending quality time with their children. Many mothers have become the major breadwinner in the household as husbands stay home and care for the kids.  This is a healthy shift in cultural trends that I feel certain will bring about an empowered next generation of fathers care and a daughter loves the special bonding moments.

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